supamun's Diaryland
Diary
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molested
I am a warrior soldier of SAF. My reputation as massacrer of the masses precedes me. Enemies quiver at the mention of my name. Rival armies flee at the glimpse of my awesome battle aura. I am faster than a speeding bullet. More powerful than a locomotive. Able to leap a building in a single jump. I am muscular, strong and handsome (though some might evidently disagree). I am a modern day adonis, an upgraded superman who fears nothing (yea, kryptonite dun scare me). You can call me supamun.
Anw, this day, although tired out at work, I was determined not to show my fatigue (as enemies anywhere, sensing my weakness, might take this chance to kill me). So I walked to the queueing line at the Toa Payoh interchange with my pectorals puffed out, clearly defined and on standby.
So far so good. I found a good seat at the back of the bus,(the long row which faces one another. It's good coz more people can admire me) sad down and immediately squared my shoulders with legs shoulder length apart, determined to project a professional image of our quite apathetic army(and also because i didn't want my throngs of fans with cameras to snap me in a compromising position, such as hand-in-nose-digging-booger or i-cant-take-my-eyes-off-that-pretty-ladeh(in truth i didn't see any cameras around, but i'm certain they're there, coz afterall i'm a supahero).But as you all know, we supaheroes are always devastated by fate's cruel blow when we least expect it. On came a big (and shall i say a little fat) woman with her mummy, and determined to wreck my party, occupied the seat beside me. My superhero sense went off like a dozen fire alarms in sync as the woman's overgrown body invaded the privacy and sanctuary of my seat's space, however I reassured myself that there was nothing to worry about, and even if there was, it was a short journey to my house, and I'd be able to get off fasta than she'd be able to stand up. oh how wrong was i going to be proven!
After seating themselves, the mummy daughter pair of evildoers started to do their stuff to antagonise the supahero. Using malay jokes as a barely disguised muse, they proceded to laugh contageously and the daughter beside me used the chance to seemingly, due to the laughter, bobble around unintentionally like a jar full of jelly, constantly brushing her elbow against my shoulders, arms and occasionally, beautifully sculted pectorals. Such a sordid act would make any lesser man yelp in disgust, but i am built of tougher stuff (that's why i'm a man of steel). "johan, momo, geddin," and my faithful servants complied. my shoulder blade and back shifted inward and forward respectively, in a last ditch attempt to avoid any further contact with "the flabby arm of death", but to no avail. Taking my passiveness and withdrawal as a symbol of unspoken consent, she proceded to laugh even more voraciously, rocking precariously on her bottoms, and rewarding herself with the freedom of piyo piyo (my body) occasionally using me as a bastion of support whenever the bus' lurch was too violent for her to bear.
Frozen with fear and defiled beyond redemption, i heaved a huge sigh of relief when she finally got off the bus. Before leaving, she apologised to me, clearly intent on maintaining her facade as a law0abiding citizen of our land. However, we all know better don't we? Still, it'll probably take me a hundred baths and endless soap scrubbing to rid me of this filthy feeling. Woe is to me!
11:41 p.m. - 2007-06-23
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